Tuesday, September 29, 2009
thinkin i'm needin
some of this since everything else is not making me smile lately...feeling a little down...wondering why people just can't be 'authentic'. Starting to realize that I need to stop caring about anything/anyone at this moment or I'm constantly going to be over analyzing every aspect of everything all the time. but I'm not really sure why I do this but I'm constantly doing it to the point I'm depressed, crying, and not really realizing what it is i'm so all over the place about in the first place..I have fucked up so many things that I want so badly because of my over rationalizing/analyzing tendencies. Keep telling myself "EASY Breezy, don't sweat it you fine and shiz" but you know I still just screwed up something that could have been awesome just because I get these bizarre totally out of bounds anxieties and can't deal with it. I just play different situations over and over and over again and start breaking them apart and freaking myself out..why the fuck do I do this? I have no idea but its preventing me from being happy in a lot of ways. I just can't think about anything without getting freaked. Why am I abnormal right now? I'm sorry we had a misunderstanding/miscommunication...just wanted my leather back. Maybe you need a little crazy in your life?...Maybe I could be the milk in your cereal, the cheese to your macaroni, I mean lets figure this out, Give me a break/chance. I'm sorry. I'm working on it. Needed to get that off my chest. Hoping you'll grow a SAck and call me up so we can clear this up and make out. maybe i fabricated all of this and in that case i'm sorry..all this is totally out of line. Now I feel stupid er somethin, maybe,dunno, can't say, whatEve. I mean i dunno if I have put this song up yet but def check it out because I wish I was this song....WASHED OUT -FEEL IT ALL AROUND... also heard some of the stuff off of Becks Record Club Leonard Cohen its kinda WTF. I dunno about all that. Whats the best fruit to make a pipe out of?...yea you guessed right its an apple. Miss Seattle a lot can't wait till thanksgiving.....Albuquerque's vacuum status is starting to wear me down....PHOTO BY ME. JENNY: Thinking daft punk is making me happy right now. Thinking these are making me right happy right now.....need to pick them up. supa cutes.